Since I’m a bit of an amateur historian, I’m well aware that Christmas was originally a secular holiday that almost all churches tried to suppress. While it was ostensibly to celebrate the birth of Jesus, for centuries Christmas was an excuse for celebration and drunken mayhem rather than creches and solemn hymns.
As such, the so-called “War on Christmas” is patently absurd, all the more so when it’s claimed that saying “Happy Holidays” is somehow a liberal affectation. Quite the contrary; retail stores invented the phrase in an obvious attempt to include non-Christians in the holiday gift-buying spirit.
Probably the dopiest part of the campaign against the “War on Christmas” is the ignorant assertion that the Obama never said “Merry Christmas.” To prove that wrong, Slate magazine brilliantly compiled this video of Barack Obama saying it seventeen times, along with a bonus “Merry Christmas” from Michelle:
You know, as I think about it, this whole “War on Christmas” nonsense is probably the least Christmas-y sentiment that it’s possible to have. It takes a certain kind of evil genius to take the happiest time of the year and turn it into an excuse to hate other people. Especially since consumption during the holiday season is major driver of the U.S. economy.
Careful listeners will notice that two of Obama’s “Merry Christmas”s are in Hawaiian. So just to round things out, here are 141 ways to say “Merry Christmas,” excerpted from WhyChristmas.com. BTW, four of the languages are imaginary; ten points to anybody who spots and identifies all four.
- Afehyia pae
- Afishapa
- Alassë a Hristomerendë
- Alussistuakeggtaarmek
- Anandi Natal or Khushi Natal
- barka dà Kirsìmatì
- Bellas festas da Nadal
- Blithe Yule
- Blunya na wo
- Bo Nadal
- Boldog karácsonyt
- Bon Nadal
- Bon Natale
- Bon Natali
- Bon Pascu
- Bon/Bun Nadèl
- Buon Natale
- Buorit Juovllat
- Chag Molad Sameach
- Chuć Mưǹg Giańg Sinh
- Crăciun Fericit
- Cualli netlācatilizpan
- Danistayohihv Aliheli’sdi Itse Udetiyvasadisv
- djoyeus Noyé
- E güeti Wïnâchte
- E keresimesi Oma
- E ku odun e ku iye’dun
- Eguberri
- Eid Milad Majid
- elicem Diem Nativitatis
- Feliĉan Kristnaskon
- Feliz Natal
- Feliz Navidad
- Frohe Weihnachten
- Frohe Weihnachten
- Geseënde Kersfees
- Gëzuar Krishtlindjen
- gilocav shoba-akhal c’els
- Glædelig Jul
- Gleðileg jól
- God Jul
- Gozhqq Keshmish
- Heri ya Krismasi
- Hristos se rodi
- Hyvää joulua
- Idara ukapade isua
- Il-Milied it-Tajjeb
- Inte mangalaashamsakal
- Iselogbe
- Izilokotho Ezihle Zamaholdeni
- Jabbama be salla Kirismati
- Jeulgaeun krismas doeseyo
- Joyeux Noël
- Juullimi Pilluarit
- Jwaye Nowe
- Kala Christouyenna
- karisama te nawāṃ sāla khušayāṃwālā hewe
- Kellemes karácsonyi ünnepeket
- Khushal Borit Natala
- Ki’imak “navidad”
- Kirismas Wacan
- Kirîsmes u ser sala we pîroz be
- kiṟistumas vāḻttukkaḷ
- Kreesmasko shubhkaamnaa
- Kris mas habbada shubhaashayagalu
- Krismas Chibai
- krismas mubarak (کرس